Thursday, October 24, 2024

DUNGEONS AND DIETS PART 5: DETERMING YOUR STATS

Welcome, yet again, to the DnD World fellow physical transformation nerds.  Herein I will continue the saga started a while back where I make hamfisted analogies between DnD and nutrition.  In this post, I will discuss how nutrition and training relate to the notion of our character stats, which, for the uninitiated, basically described the general attributes that make us who we are.  Whereas class determines what we do for a living and race determines our ethnic background (which, in turn, can influence what we have an affinity toward, and aversion against, and other qualities, ultimately being an appropriate representation of “genetics”), the stats are the point black numerical representation of where we stand in the world.  Allow me a quick crash course and then an explanation of where this is headed.


Inevitably, it's always this


There are six core stats in the world of Dungeons and Dragons: Strength (my obvious favorite), Dexterity, Constitution, Wisdom, Intelligence and Charisma.  For a quick rundown, strength is obvious, and will impact how much damage you do with melee weapons, whereas dexterity impacts ranged weapons along with your general ability to move swiftly/steal stuff/etc.  Constitution is like endurance/hardiness/hard-to-kill-ability.  For the best ever explanation of the last three: intelligence is knowing that a tomato is a fruit, wisdom is understanding that you shouldn’t put tomato in a fruit salad, charisma is understanding that you can sell a tomato fruit salad as salsa.  Intelligence is knowing stuff, wisdom is being able to actually apply the stuff you know, and charisma is about emotional intelligence and being able to navigate/manipulate people.  And here’s what else you need to know: stats range typically range from 3-18 for a newly created character, with 3 being the absolute worst you could be at something and 18 being the absolute best, traditionally indicating that a “newly minted” person in the DnD world is all 10s down the board: completely average.  So now let’s talk about HOW we can those stats to range from 3-18 vs simply walking around as straight 10s down the board.

 

There are 2 primary ways to determine your stats in DnD: you can “roll a character”, which you’ve most likely heard the term before, or you can employ a “point buy” system.  In the case of the former, traditional/hardcore rules dictate rolling 3 six sided die (3 d6, if you wanna know the hardcore lingo) and whatever those numbers add up to: that’s your stat.  You can see how 3-18 happens now.  A kinder/gentler approach is to roll FOUR six sided die and take the best 3 of those 4 rolls.  In either case, you do this for a total of 6 times, and then plug the results into your stats.  There are even more homerules approaches to this, but we’ll cap it off there for now, because this is already going to get way too wordy.  Point buy, on the other hand, is a system wherein you are allotted a fixed amount of total points to spend across the 6 stats.  It removes randomness from the equation and creates a more “fair” character creation process.  Worth appreciating is that, as stats get higher, they require more points spent to increase the stat (like, going from 10 to 11 strength only costs 1 point, whereas going from 17 to 18 costs 3, for an example).  Already THAT is an excellent metaphor for training, and how, the more advanced you become, the harder you have to work to get the gains that used to come so easy at the beginning, but perhaps I’ll save that for another blogpost.  Worth appreciating is the fact that the Dungeon Master will ultimately decide HOW many points you could to play with: if they want you to have a high power campaign, you get a lot of points, whereas a low level campaign will be few points.


You laugh until you realize these are YOUR party members...

 


Now, all THAT established…what the hell does it have to do with nutrition?  Because, in the realm of physical transformation, nutrition is what DETERMINES your “stat pool”.  Irrespective of if you are doing point buy or rolling a character, your nutrition determines what NUMBERS you have to play with.  But what makes us roll a character vs point buy?  Nuance and approach, fundamentally.  Many MANY trainees are employing a “roll a character” approach in the hopes of scoring a whole bunch of 18s with some random luck, but if these folks want a predictable and fair approach, they need to engage in some point buying.  Allow me to explain.

 

When I was young, I definitely was rolling stats as far as my nutrition went.  My focus was on food QUANTITY.  I was operating under the premise that, as long as I ate ENOUGH of it, I was BOUND to eat the right stuff to trigger the physical transformation I required.  I watched the scale as my feedback for my success, and saw my bodyweight climb up as I pounded away all the fast food, yummy sugary treats, blender bombs, gainers, PBJs and quick fixes I could get my hands on.  It was an approach of pure randomness that I had convinced myself was logical and intelligent: as long as I kept my protein high, I was bound to be building muscle, and all that other food was going to provide me energy to fuel training and the metabolic functions necessary to promote growth.  And this is not that much further away from If It Fits Your Macros, operating under the premise that, as long as you hit specific benchmarks and milestones of nutrition, you’re going to get the results you desire.


I was taking some nutritional cues from this dude...in his 2008 era of nutrition


 

As I wrote: this is randomness.  It’s rolling 3 die and hoping they end up all 6s.  Maybe they will…and maybe it’ll be all 1s.  Because, unfortunately for you, there IS nuance when it relates to this whole “human biology” stuff, and what you eat DOES have a determining impact on the outcome you receive.  Calories in/Calories out may determine bodyWEIGHT outcomes, but it does NOT determine body COMPOSITION outcomes.  And along with that, WHAT we eat can even impact BOTH the calories in AND calories out portion of the equation: foods we cannot actually properly digest due to intolerances among other issues will not factor into our “calories in” despite our counting of it, and some nutrients are going to have a thermic effect that actually contribute to their own “calories out” portion of the equation, to say nothing of the impact of surplus energy sometimes unconsciously impacting our own non-exercise activity thermogenesis (NEAT).  And then, from there, we can discuss the impact of spiking insulin frequently with sugary food intake vs the impact of a fat based diet, the influence of being in a fat adapted/ketogenic state vs a sugar burning state, the myriad of hormone responses in the body, etc.  This isn’t to say that calories/energy/macros DON’T matter, but to say that OTHER things ALSO matter…which brings us to point buy.

 

With point buy, the randomness is taken away from the equation.  This is what one hopes to accomplish with a more nuanced nutritional approach.  And look: you already know I’m big on carnivore, but at least you ALSO know I’m big on it BECAUSE of the research and personal experimentation I’ve done in order to come to this conclusion over MANY decades of playing around with my nutrition.  In the same way, I fully support people with a mixed diet, a vegan diet, a flexible diet, etc etc, so much as they have taken the time to consider BEYOND merely their caloric and macronutrient needs when determining WHAT to put into their body.  Because nutrition DOES have more to it than that…at least, if our goal is to have a solid stat pool to pull from as far as physical transformation goes.  By going deeper and understanding the hormonal impact of food, the influence of micronutrients and minerals, the impact digestion plays and our ability to actually ABSORB the nutrients we are consuming, avoiding our own personal food intolerances, etc etc, we allow ourselves to remove randomness from the equation and to be able to have a much more stable stat pool to draw from. 


I get how you 90s kids think random is always best

 


And, in turn, we absolutely have the opportunity to achieve some 18s: it’s just not going to happen accidentally.  It will be focused and achieved through legit hard work and research.  Stan Efferding is a fantastic example of someone who took the effort to play in a high level campaign with their stat points, along with folks like Thomas Delauer, John Meadows, John Berardi, etc.  Can you Sam Sulek, Dave Tate, Randall Strossen, Paul Anderson, Hugh Cassidy your way to victory as well, by simply relying on the notion that quantity is a quality in and of itself?  For sure: randomness is always an option, especially in the realm of DnD, but what IS worth appreciating is that even those aforementioned people at least had a method to their madness.  None of them were simply relying on an app to tell them what their “goals” were: many were at least mindful enough to have a theory to their approach to nutrition.   

 

 

And once we have our stat NUMBERS, it is training that determines stat ALLOCATION.  Yes, if you train to get stronger, you’ll be able to take that high number you either rolled or saved up points for and put it in strength.  You spend your time on mobility, it goes to dexterity.  Spend it on endurance, it goes to constitution.  Etc etc.  But the key takeaway here is this: training determines ALLOCATION: it does not determine AMOUNT.  The actual stat NUMBERS you get to play with are a product OF that nutrition.  You can train as hard as you want: if the nutrition isn’t there to actually give you a high stat pool, you’re just going to take your highest crappy stat and put it into one of your attributes.  So congrats: you now have a 12 in strength instead of a 10.  Play a high level campaign and you’ll have a MUCH better character to play.


Although sometimes you SWEAR they were cheating when they made their character...


 

Roll a character or point buy: the decision is yours.  But, in real life, you don’t’ get a mulligan on your die rolling: what you roll is what you roll.  Do you really wanna risk being all 10s and 8s in your pursuit of an 18? 

Friday, October 18, 2024

LESSONS LEARNED FROM CONAN THE BARBARIAN: BUILD THE BASE FIRST, THEN SPECIALIZE

Once again, it’s incredible how those OUTSIDE the realm of physical transformation understand the process SO much better than those of us inside of it, proof of concept enough that we “get this” on an instinctual, primal, lizard brain level, and it takes the kind of hubris and stupidity that can only be produced by humans to convince ourselves that there is a “better way”.  In today’s diatribe, I reference the phenomenal 80s movie “Conan The Barbarian”, inspired by the works of Robert Howard and his “Conan the Cimmerian” stories, but I wish to make the distinction that I am SPECIFICALLY referring to this movie in this instance.  If you have NOT seen this movie: stop reading right now and go watch it.  It is your birthright to do so, and it will also make it that this post does not spoil anything.  This movie chronicles Conan’s beginnings, including the ransacking of his village as a child, his being taken into slavery, being forced to fight in the pits for his life, and his eventual escape from slavery and journeys as a dangerous man seeking vengeance for the slaughter of his people.  It was a breakthrough role for Arnold, has a banging soundtrack, and viewing it is an anabolic experience.  But, specifically, I want to focus on that early part of the film, for, within it, the filmmakers actually laid out for the viewers a FANTASTIC protocol for physical transformation, which, somehow, we all overlooked, forgot, and reversed.  Conan undergoes a process of developing a BROAD physical base to build from before he goes through a process of specialization to become an incredibly dangerous man, yet so many trainees want to either do this in reverse or completely skip the first part.


Just like skipping leg day


 

When Conan is first captured and sold into slavery, he is put to work on the “Wheel of Pain”, which is one of the most iconic scenes in 80s barbarian film history (which may sound incredibly niche, but is actually a pretty well fleshed out genre of film).  It’s not really stated what the intent is behind this wheel: it’s simply an apparatus that slaves/prisoners are chained to that they push laboriously, day in and day out, with no rest in sight.  The mechanics of it are not unlike a prowler: there’s no eccentric load, you just set your hips and shoulders and push for all you’re worth.  Over the years, we watch Conan’s development laboring under this wheel, going from a scrawny boy into a powerfully built man, each day and each repetition lending itself toward developing a powerful and massive physique: the result of much general toil with no real specific intention behind it.  And, once his time on the wheel has been deemed adequate by outside observers, Conan faces his second phase: time in the pits.

 

Now a fully grown man (“grown” here emphasized, because god DAMN did he get big), Conan is thrown into the pits in order to fight for his life and the fortune of those who wager upon him.  His captors are banking on the premise that Conan’s time under the wheel has given him the physical advantages necessary to be able to take on all comers, for when you observe HOW Conan fights initially, it is clearly the work of an untrained savage (dare I say: a barbarian).  He fights primal and feral, like a caged animal backed into a corner and forced to defend itself.  He bites, gouges, grabs, smashes, and oafishly clubs and swings whatever weapons he manages to acquire.  As time goes on, we see Conan start to develop his own style and approach to combat.  He takes that raw, physical talent of his and is able to sharpen it to a finer point through frequent repetition, practice, refinement, and testing of concepts under the most rigorous possible testing field one could engage in: quite literal “succeed or die” situations.  Much like how, under the era of Miyamoto Musashi, inferior swordfighting styles were weeding by means of killing to owner of the style to prevent it’s flourishing, there was no room for significant error under Conan’s pitfighting phase of training, and lessons had to be learned quickly in order to continue to thrive.  It was from here that Conan entered his final phase of training: specificity.



Just in case you legit have no idea what I'm talking about

 


Yes, after enough time in the pits fighting as a barbarian and developing the basics of combat, Conan’s captures saw fit to get him some REAL training, in order to take that edge he had developed and turn it razor sharp.  We observe him receiving personalized sword instruction from a master instructor, no longer relying on instinct and savagery, but instead learning about technique, precision, efficiency and maximizing capabilities.  It is at the end of this phase that Conan has reached “peak dangerous”: he has all the raw physical strengths granted to him from the Wheel of Pain, the savagery, aggression and instincts granted to him by his time fighting in the pits, and the technique, skill and proficiency afforded to him by direct, one-on-one expert level training and coaching.

 

WHICH IS SUCH AN OBVIOUS WAY TO DO THINGS!  It’s so obvious that fantasy authors and script writers managed to figure it out without ANY advanced education in the realm of physical transformation, yet you have individuals who dare to refer to themselves as coaches that are out there trying to convince new trainees that they need to START with specialization and MAYBE consider building up some GPP when they run into a stall.  Jesus Christ how are we this stupid?  Everyone who WATCHED Conan the Barbarian ALSO totally understood what was going on, and yet we, who call ourselves “ironheads” or “meatheads” or “strength athletes” or “athletes” or any other term expressing our interest, love and passion for physical transformation somehow convinced ourselves that the most obvious approach to physical transformation was wrong and that flipping it on its head would somehow get us where we wanted to go.



Just want to point out that none of this is doctored or edited



 


Learn from Conan: he had it totally figured out.  I upset a LOT of folks on the internet when they ask what they should do to start lifting and I say “Go play a sport for 6 months”, but it’s the absolute truth: if you have NO athletic base, you need to develop that FIRST before you start touching barbells.  It’s taken for granted that a trainee will have such an athletic base, but we currently live in a world where a human can grow to an adult at the age of 18 having NEVER played any manner of sport during that time, and some of these individuals never engaged in any sort of basic outside play either.  No running, jumping, swimming, swinging, crawling, etc etc.  What happens when you throw this adult into the pits?  They get killed within the first 10 seconds: they have NO physical attributes to rely on to allow them an opportunity to discover and refine their inherent savagery.  We need to get in shape BEFORE we get in shape.

 

And again, if you HAD that sports background, it would make total sense to you.  When you show up out of shape, you aren’t able to spend the time necessary to develop the reps to develop the skills, because you gas out too quickly in practice.  If you’ve ever attended a martial arts class, you’ll see this first hand: folks aren’t able to do the drill for the day to develop their skills because they’re winded and their muscles are tired.  Whatever reps they DO drill are sloppy and reinforcing bad technique.  It’d be similar to trying to learn to shoot freethrows after doing 500 lateral raises: your shoulders are just junked up and you can’t get the mechanics right.  But if you get yourself in good shape first (like, generally prepared to do physical stuff…GPP?), when it comes time to learn the skills, you’ll be able to focus on JUST learning those skills, AND you’ll be able to apply all your physical strengths INTO the skills as well.  You’ll be physically able to learn AND physically able to produce.


When you're built like this at 15, you get to be the heavyweight champ at 20

 


And from here, we can move on still to a phase of GENERAL strength training.  It makes no sense for us to try to master the sword when we don’t have any of the necessary aggression, savagery, or reflexes to make use of the weapon in our hand.  Similarly, dedicating ourselves to mastering a handful of lifts makes no sense when we haven’t even developed any sort of rudimentary BASIC strength and coordination with the iron.  There are a LOT of muscles in the body, and they’re all pretty cool at getting bigger and stronger, and to focus on just a handful of them so we can master a few lifts is a surefire way to burn out quick, accumulate overuse injuries and end up neglecting parts that will eventually result in plateauing until we address them.  BUT, if we show up for specialization as a specimen who has spent time developing a broad general base of strength through a wide variety of exercises, we have MUCH more potential to draw from when it comes time to specialize.

 

Because there’s nothing wrong with specialization: it’s the key to maximizing our ability to be dangerous.  But there IS something wrong with trying to specialize at the wrong time.  If Conan attempted to master the sword as a boy, he would have been slaughtered by the first highwayman he came across in his quest for vengeance.  Sword mastery can only carry you so far when you’re 4’ tall and weigh 60lbs.  In turn, if you decide to take on the squat, bench press and deadlift from day 1, you’re most likely going to hit your first stall at about 80lbs.  But, if you decide to spend the necessary time suffering under the wheel and fighting in the pits, when you decide to undertake mastery, you will be able to excel FAR and for long periods of time, being able to rely on all the qualities and attributes you developed leading up to that decision.  While others fumble merely attempting to hold the sword, your physique and instinct will carry you far.


VERY far

 


Learn these lessons from Conan.  Hell, soon enough I can discuss his nutritional wisdom as well. 

    

Friday, October 11, 2024

BLESSED ARE THE GEEK: THE BENEFITS OF EXISTING ON THE FRINGE

I have never been cool.  I grew up a fat kid, from day 1, which I most recently learned was primarily because my parents followed the conventional wisdom at the time of the 80s to put cereal in our bottles so that we’d fatten up and sleep through the night faster, which meant I quite literally never had a chance, and from the first day of school I was an obvious target.  My family was also not particularly high income, so most of my clothes were hand me downs from my brother, Walmart specials my grandmother got me for Christmas, “Payless” brand shoes, etc.  From there, I also had nerdy hobbies: I loved video games, martial arts (they were NOT cool back then: this wasn’t MMA), Magic The Gathering, Pokemon, comic books and their trading cards, etc, and I shunned most sports, primarily because I was bad at them (but, keep in mind, this was 30+ years ago, so I still PLAYED a bunch of them growing up compared to today’s perpetual inside kids).  Even when I lost the weight in high school and got into lifting, it didn’t suddenly make me cool, despite what a lot of young trainees HOPE will happen when they start lifting: I was now just the nerdy kid that lifted weights.  After graduating from college at age 21, I married my college sweetheart (who is still with me to this day: I really struck gold), and my first car as a minivan…we had no kids…and I loved that van and drove it for 13 years.  And as a married man with a minivan, you can surmise that I did NOT spent my early 20s partying…especially as a non-drinker, smoker, or recreational drug user.  I say none of this seeking your sympathy: the opposite in fact.  I say all of this to establish what an INCREDIBLE advantage I had with this upbringing.  I’ve NEVER been cool so, in turn, I’ve never been in any sort of rush to conform or comply with what IS cool.  I’ve ALWAYS existed on the fringe, which has, in turn, given me access to SO many more opportunities compared to those that ONLY know the straight and narrow party-approved methods and ways forward.


Wisecracking smart aleck nerdy strong dude: there's a reason I resonate so well with this character



In point of fact, upon my own self-examination, it would appear that my lifetime perpetual uncoolness has resulted in me simply having my OWN bias that just so happens to REJECT the mainstream vs seek it: counter-culture purely for its own sake, which is trite and tedious in of itself on a social level (going back to my own 90s roots, the goth kids hanging out at Hot Topic just to form their own bizarro reverse-cliques) BUT, as it relates to physical transformation, has been a boon.  Holy cow that was a crazy run-on sentence.  But harken back to a key point I’ve made time and again: if you keep doing what everyone else is doing, you’re going to get the results that everyone else is getting.  In order to BE different, one must ACT differently, and this relates to methods and methodology employed in the pursuit of physical transformation.  One does not necessarily guarantee BETTER results, but they will at LEAST be different results, and those of us perpetually uncool individuals are VERY familiar and downright comfortable with being different.

 

This lifetime existence on the fringe made it that the idea of 20 breathing squats followed by pullovers to expand my ribcage and a gallon of milk a day made SO much sense to me, despite, to this day, having young trainees STILL try to inform me that you need more volume than that, squats don’t build the upper body, you can’t expand your ribcage, a gallon of milk a day will only make you fat and give you diabetes, and you can only gain .5lbs of muscle a week and anything after that is 100% pure fat.  Even IF all of that was true, one CANNOT account for the intangible benefits that came with my pursuit of Super Squats early in my lifting journey (but not early enough, because god DAMN do I wish this was my first ever program): I learned how to push myself STUPIDLY hard in the weight room AND in the dinning room, how to OBSESS over progress, and how to eat, live and breathe training: a skillset that was INVALUABLE in my pursuit of physical transformation, and came into play when I pursued ANOTHER fringe program by way of Jon Andersen’s Deep Water program.  Wherein, once again, the training AND the nutrition contained within it completely violated all semblance of what was “cool” and, once again, by following the protocol, I unlocked SO much inside of myself that simply could not be done if I stuck with the mundane 3-5 sets of 8-12 reps for 2-4 exercises per muscle group that all the cool kids did while they calculated their macros based off their TDEE with the ideal macro spread of chicken, rice and broccoli. 


In a world where "chicken, rice and broccoli" is somehow cool, be uncool and eat steak and eggs

 


My mind simply cannot be satisfied or placated by coolness, for I interpret it as “mundaneness” and, ultimately, ineffectiveness.  A program that is based around balance and gradual returns simply will not satisfy me: I need stupid gimmicks and hooks that fly in the face of all accepted conventions.  It’s honestly amazing I never got into HIT honestly, but maybe that’s because I somehow KNEW there was going to be a resurgence of it thanks to Tik Tok and it would one day become cool again, so I headed that off at the past.  And my nutrition has been this way as well: I was low-carb BEFORE it was cool, which, of course, meant I had to go take it in an even stupider direction once that got tired out and ended up becoming Captain Carnivore while the rest of the community derided it.  I honestly wouldn’t know how to function if I wasn’t getting made fun of for the way I do things: it’s literally the ONLY way I’ve ever known how to live.  And again: I don’t say this to lament my upbringing, but simply to highlight it.  There’s this mythos that those who get bullied take up lifting weights in order to create “armor” to protect themselves and that they grow stronger as a form of overcompensation, but perhaps what we’re instead observing is the instance wherein a lifetime of existing on the fringe sets one up to select the methods that are going to ensure a different outcome on the quest for physical transformation compared to what the majority will experience. 


Although if you ARE going to get revenge on bullies, this is MUCH better material than "bully beatdown"

 


Those that have existed on the fringe in perpetuity will be the ones who end up becoming the outliers as a result of fringe methods producing fringe results.

 

          

Wednesday, October 2, 2024

THE TARRASQUE SLAYER: IMPOSSIBLE GOALS FOR RIDICULOUS RESULTS

Welcome back to the DnD world fellow lifting nerds (referring to folks who are both nerds about lifting and also nerds who happen to lift, look at me go with the double meanings).  Today, I’m going to discuss what was once an in-joke between me and my brother: The Tarrasque Slayer.  And, in turn, how this joke actually models the very behavior that so many young trainees shy away from when they should, instead, run full tilt after it…much like the Tarrasque itself.  “What in the 9 Hells is a Tarrasque?” you say, already demonstrating your DnD nerdery with the correct number of hells?

 

THIS is a Tarrasque

 

Like something painted on the side of a van in the 70s


 

It is described as this in the Monster Manual as “the most terrible creature known to inhabit the Prime Material Plane. The beast is a full 50 feet (15 meters) tall and 70 feet (21 meters) long quadruped with a long tail, reflective carapace, and two large horns on its head. Supposedly, there is only one tarrasque, which slumbers within the world's core.”  Along with that, it’s immune to just about every spell, resists damage from all but the most heavily enchanted of weapons, has about a million hit points which it can regenerate during battle, etc etc.  It is absolutely ridiculous, and was frequently a threat leveraged by a Dungeon Master against an unruly party: “Play nice or I’ll make you guys fight a Tarrasque and have a total party kill”.

 

BUT, there’s also one other feature there to focus on: there’s only ONE of these things.  Which makes “The Tarrasque Slayer” equally ridiculous.  What is a Tarrasque Slayer?  In the world of DnD, one of the character classes a player can choose is “The Ranger”.  I’ve written extensively about the Barbarian, the Fighter, the Monk and the Paladin, but haven’t divulged much about the Ranger.  Think of them like Aragaon from “Lord of the Rings”: these are a fighting type class, typically fleet of foot/lightly armored and connected with nature, with animal companions and an affinity for hunting.  But what REALLY makes Rangers unique is their ability to have a “favored enemy”: a certain creature/race/enemy type that they gain an advantage to find, hunt and fight due to a combination of an extensive amount of time studying the enemy often paired with a deep seated hatred for said enemy.  You have rangers that are orc-slayers, giant-slayers, vampire-slayers (SO cliché), etc etc…which brings us to “The Tarrasque Slayer”.


This vampire slayer had the looks Buffy could only DREAM of

 


Consider how ridiculous the premise of that is, because you pick out your favored enemy at level ONE.  Level one rangers can get one-shotted by a Goblin armed with a sling who rolls lucky: they need to focus on not tripping over their bootlaces rather than trying to bring down the most terrible creature to inhabit the Prime Material Plane.  And then consider the fact there is only ONE Tarrasque in the game: you’ll NEVER get to actually USE the advantages of your favored enemy outside of ONE battle.  If you pick Goblin as your favored enemy, you’ll get to use your advantages against hundreds, if not THOUSANDS of the little buggers.  If you pick “Demon”, there’s an entire Abyss FULL of demons to unleash your fury on.  But there will only ever be ONE Tarrasque: all of your extensive study, training, preparation, and hatred will be for naught if you never even get to the damn thing. 

 

…or will it?  Consider this: just how ridiculous will the Tarrasque Slayer be when it fights a non-Tarrasque enemy?  What happens when you take the dude who has dedicated himself to fight a 50’ tall unkillable magical beast and pit him against a common orc?  An ogre?  Hell even a lich or a dragon?  Those things are traditionally pretty terrifying, but if you’ve established your baseline at “Tarrasque”, these fearsome creatures…they’re honestly kinda mundane.  Kinda “blah” and ho-hum.  “Hey, listen dragon, it’s cool you breathe acid and all, but I’m looking for something that’s a bit more of a challenge.”  Yes, the Tarrasque Slayer may have dedicated himself to the sole task of slaying only ONE creature…but by picking the most terrible creature known to inhabit the Prime Material Plane, it means they’re PROBABLY pretty darn good at slaying creatures that AREN’T quite so ridiculous.


Sorta like how a guy who has trained to fight 1 300lb man can take on 2 150lb men

 


This extends SO far into the realm of physical transformation that it’s honestly ridiculous what a great fit it is AND equally ridiculous how much folks fight this idea.  I constantly observe trainees that DEMAND to know what their limitations are as far as goal setting goes.  They’ll train for one month and ask the collective internet hivemind to evaluate their genetics to determine if they have “any hope” in this game.  They question anyone who has achieved anyone in success by claiming that they must be using every drug and have superior genetics and every other conceivable advantage possible, demanding that SOMONE out there present them with “realistic expectations” for an average trainee to be able to accomplish.  These folks are kobold-slayers: they’re trying to specialize in fighting the easiest monsters in the game.  They have no ambition to succeed.  And, in turn, they are going to peak VERY early in the game: their utility will quickly wane, and soon no one is going to want them around because they are going to be worthless.

 

Chase after a Tarrasque out there in the realm of physical transformation.  No one has pulled a 1200lb deadlift yet, so why not you?  Why not try to get NINE Olympia wins?  Go run a 90 minute marathon.  Do it all drug-free, carb-free, underweight, underslept, overstressed.  Take on the biggest challenges you can possibly take on in pursuit of the most ridiculous goals you could possibly chase.  Why?  Because through the PURSUIT of these goals, you will grow to BE ridiculous.  Someone chasing a 400lb deadlift will eventually catch it.  Great: now what?  Someone chasing a 1200lb deadlift won’t even think twice when 400 crosses their path: they will be marching onward to 500, 600 and on.  And funny enough, time tends to stretch to meet the very demands we have.  When we dedicate our lives to a 400lb deadlift, it will most likely take us our whole lives to get there.  When 1200 is on our mind?  400 happens QUICK.  Like the slayer cutting through an army of Orcs: what seems amazing to others will simply be a Tuesday for you.


GAME...OVER!
 


Pick “Tarrasque” as your favored enemy.  Become a dedicated slayer of the most terrible creature to inhabit the Prime Material Plane.  Let everyone else concern themselves with Hobgoblins and Trolls: you’re here for the BIG game.