BACK TO BULLETPOINTS

* I’ve been saying for years that, if I could only do 2 movements with a goal of being as awesome as possible, I’d pick the log viper press and the high handle prowler push.  The question that remained was “how to train those movements” as it related to the goal, and based on my recent experiment with Tactical Barbell’s Operator Pro, I think THAT is the answer, if not, at least, AN answer.  The log viper press would be trained as THE lifting cluster for Operator, while the prowler would be trained as Black conditioning.  I’d use the layout like I did for the strongman program: 3-6 weeks with the hypertrophy range, and 3-6 weeks with strength range, while still having that weekly 2-3rm test.  Prowler workouts would co-opt sprint and hill workouts from TBII.  I genuinely want to try this idea out sometime, but if anyone out there in internetland wants to be the test monkey on this, let me know how it goes.  If this WAS a desert island scenario, one COULD do something other than the high handle push with the prowler, like backwards drags to really blow up the quads or low handle push to drill having the hips lower, but if it was some sort of weird dystopian situation where you’re just handcuffed to 2 movements, I think this would really just take care of everything.

When the press is named after this dude, you know it's going to do some good.  And Derek was a fan of pushing against a shut off treadmill in place of a prowler, if you need a DIY solution

 

* As I was tackling my prowler sprints this morning, it dawned on me that they probably ARE more analogous to hill workouts than straight up sprints.  Because the prowler is a constant concentric force that stops as soon as you quit moving, it’s very similar to pumping hard up a steep incline, compared to running hard/fast on a flat surface.  You can definitely still use sprint protocols, but as far as a 1 for 1 goes, I think calling it a hill workout makes a lot of sense.

 

* The sous vide is the future of meal prep…except it’s the past.  But goddamn do I wish I had discovered it earlier.  Aside from the fact that you can batch make a TON of food with it with minimal effort, these batches can also be refrigerated or frozen for later use, after which time you just thaw out and are good to go.  A quick sear is dandy, but not at all necessary, and considering bodybuilders are all about eating dry plain chicken breasts and rice, an unseared steak or chicken isn’t the worst thing ever.  The sous vide also avoids dealing with dormitory rules or roommates that don’t want to smell your cooking. 

 

* The above segues into one of my more recent laments in that I discovered all sorts of awesome cooking techniques and strategies AFTER the period of my life where I was trying to eat as much as possible to grow as much as possible.  The hedonist in me appreciates how I spent my early 20s mainlining fast food while my body could still handle it, but I think about how much further ahead I would have been living off brisket and ribs instead of Taco Bell and In n Out burger.

 

* Justin Harris said on Jon Heck’s podcast that it’s frustrating to most meatheads how LITTLE work it takes to make progress in the gym.  There is an old zen koan, where a monk asked a Zen master how long it would take to reach enlightenment, and the master replied “10 years”.  The monk replied “what if I try very hard” the master said “then 20 years”.  This is the dirty secret of physical transformation.  Yes, we DO need to train hard…but only SO hard, and only SO much.  Once we bypass that, we end up reversing our progress.  And I realize who I am as I say this, but I also am able to look back and recognize when I was doing the things that make me grow and when I was working against that goal.

Another instance of "listening to this dude is probably a good idea".  And Heck is no slouch either!

 

* Which isn’t to say that there is NO value to be had when we engage in those stupidly hard training protocols.  Super Squats, Deep Water, and all my forays into training insanity built a degree of mental/physical fortitude that simply can’t be replicated through any other means, and those skillsets can be carried forward into other endeavors.  We frequently observe the issue of trainees who DON’T know how to push hard enough to generate any sort of change, and tilting at these windmills helps us re-calibrate our understanding of what effort and strain REALLY feel like.  The trick, from there, now that we know HOW hot the fire can get, is to now learn how to control it, so that we don’t get burned by it.

 

* I continue to experiment nutritionally with eating fewer and fewer meals while still getting in adequate protein intake as a result of my carnivore leanings.  In turn, I continue to progress in the weightroom between training cycles.  I know Robert Sikes is able to progress with only 1-2 meals a day as well.  I think it goes to demonstrate how significant the “80%” is in regards to the 80% solution when it comes to physical transformation.  As much as it’s fun to talk about and chase optimization, when you have the basics covered, you can pretty much do whatever you want and you’ll progress toward your goal, whereas, when you DON’T have those basics covered, it doesn’t matter how dialed in the rest of your life is.  4-5 meals per day isn’t going to make a difference if those meals are pure processed junk and amino spiked protein junkfood. 

 

* Another one of those “wish I figured this out earlier” thing is the benefit of movement variation.  The gym bros were right about “muscle confusion” but not for the right reason.  Switching up the movement helps prevent overuse injuries and burnout, and the reality is you’re STILL going to get strong if you switch from squats to front squats for a few cycles.  The issue is, when you first start lifting, EVERY training cycle seems so significant, and the idea of spending 3-6 WEEKS training something different gives you this fear that you’re going to “lose all your gains”.  And that fear self-perpetuates, because you’re so BAD at the movement due to being so new that you DO “lose” a lot of strength from time away, so then you decide to cling onto just ONE movement FOREVER.  But you get enough time under your belt and you develop enough of a baseline that detraining doesn’t take much out of you AND the time away gives your connective tissue some time to heal and recover.  It builds upon itself and contributes to better overall progress.  Dante REALLY did a great job with this in DoggCrapp, and, of course, Louie Simmons with Westside, but SO many of us bought into this over-specialization approach in order to “master the movement”.

Also another dude that liked movement variation AND had some Westside experience

 

* Which, on the above, as is the cases in most elite athletes, those athletes who ARE able to just train the same movement indefinitely without issue demonstrate just what, exactly, it is about them that makes them elite.  They have the structures that THRIVE with these movements, such that they are natural and non-destructive to the body.  For those of us not so graced, we’re on borrowed time with each workout, and need to pay the piper at one point.  When you look at an elite weightlifter, you see someone LITERALLY built to be a weightlifter: long torsos, short limbs, all fast twitch.  Can you imagine if Mark Felix, Steve Goggins or Layne Norton tried to follow the Bulgarian method for weightlifting?  These are elite dudes, but their knees would fall off from high bar squatting/snatching 3x a day for weeks on end.

 

* I spend time on subreddits for gaining weight, and it’s fascinating seeing how those that struggle to gain weight have the exact same issues as those struggling to lose weight: just in reverse.  In both cases, it’s a complete lack of awareness of what it is that they are eating as it relates to their goals.  A struggling gainer will wonder why it is that they eat “ALL THE TIME” and don’t gain, and you peel back the onion and discover that IF they’re eating, it’s chicken breasts, rice and broccoli.  Someone struggling to lose weight “barely eats”, and it’s because they don’t count their 700 calorie Starbucks treat in the morning and think that, because their triple whopper is “just ONE burger”, it’s not much.  It’s fascinating the tricks our brains play on us to protect our own internal narratives and spare us from cognitive dissonance.  The process of change is disruptive and unenjoyable, and frequently requires some sort of “oh sh*t” moment for us to be able to break the cycle.

 

* Among many other stupid things I want to one day do, I’d really love to take on the “Gaston Diet” and see exactly the outcome.  For those unfamiliar with the Disney classic “Beauty and the Beast”, the main antagonist, Gaston, is a muscular man who proports to have eaten 4 dozen eggs every morning as a lad (to grow large), and that now that he’s grown he eats 5 dozen eggs.  Taking a breakdown of 70 calories per egg, with 5g of fat, 6g of protein and half a gram of carbs (your eggs may vary, this just makes the math simple), you’re looking at a lad’s diet of 3360 calories, 240g of fat, 288g of protein and 24g of carbs, and a full grown man’s diet of 4200 calories, 300g of fat, 360g of protein, and 30g of carbs.  A few things to consider is that this was just BREAKFAST, so presumably you’d eat even more throughout the day, but if we DID just try to survive off Gaston’s breakfast, for one: Vince Gironda would be happy for us (and ask that we keep the eggs raw), and we’d most likely be in a solid ketogenic state, as we’re getting about 65% of our calories from fat and the remainder from protein (and some trace carbs).  And, of course, with this being France, we’d be remiss if we didn’t include plenty of butter in our cuisine as well, and Gaston, as a hunter, most likely ate quite a bit of game meat. 

 

For those who demand that I cite my sources

* Which, on the above: still better than the standard American diet.  But also I can see the comments about it being prohibitively expensive, especially in eras where we are finding egg shortages due to bird flus.  Walmart DOES sell 60 eggs for $7.13 here in the states, of which I’m sure the eggs come from chickens raised in TERRIBLE conditions to achieve that price point, but it DOES make this whole adventure a bit more sustainable.  And if we pair this with my training plan listed above, I think we may have the next great big challenge for anyone in internetland to take on…

 

* Continuing on the trend of nerdom: I feel like the one big advantage I got from my time playing tabletop RPGs is that it taught me how to learn the rules of various different systems and how to keep them all straight/organized in my head.  I can shift between Dungeons and Dragons, Pathfinder, World of Darkness and Shadowrun without muddying them up, despite the fact they all use pen, paper and dice to play.  This is similar to how I can mentally categorize and separate the rules of 5/3/1 from Tactical Barbell from Westside from Deep Water etc etc.  And it’s also why I’m so persnickety about language when it comes to discussing these systems, and don’t let people get away with calling assistance work in 5/3/1 “accessory”, because that’s a Westside thing and it’s different.  But, in turn, when people say that 5/3/1 Forever doesn’t make sense or they can’t figure out Tactical Barbell, I find it’s because they’re combining everything in their head rather than being able to make this separation.

 

* That said, one of the WORST qualities that comes from having that background above is the desire to “optimize” everything because pen and paper players tend to spend SIGNIFICANT more time BUILDING characters than actually playing them.  We’re SO good about reading EVERY single book out there regarding how to play the game and absolutely terrible at actually PLAYING the game.  Contrast this with people who grew up actually playing sports, and most likely DON’T know who the greatest athletic trainer of all time is, because they were too busy actually being athletes to get bogged down in that nerd sh-t.

 

* Influencers influence.  It’s what they do.  And they’re at least honest about that because that’s what they call themselves.  They aren’t informers, educators, mentors, scholars, etc.  So, in turn: quit getting upset at influencers for influencing!  You’re falling for pure kayfabe.  It’s like legitimately thinking that the Iron Sheik hated America and, in turn, hating him for it.  Influencers are going to say and do things to get clicks and traffic, because that’s how they survive and get paid.  This means they’re going to say things that upset you, because THAT gets far more clicks than agreeable content.  And if you sit there and ragewatch it just to get upset, all you’re doing is giving them exactly what they want.  It’s the Freddy Krueger rule: the only way to beat them is to ignore them.

We learned this lesson over 100 years ago...

 

* The most frustrating part about having a good message is it will never reach the people that need to hear it.  Those that need it won’t listen, and those that don’t need it will seek it out to re-affirm themselves.  It’s how echo chambers form.  Which, in turn, isn’t to say that what is being said in echo chambers is WRONG: it’s just unnecessary.