THE FORM CHECK: TREATING THE SYMPTOMS AND IGNORING THE DISEASE

It is without hyperbole that I say the internet form check is responsible for retarding the progress of the majority of trainees online today.  Trainees who could have spent years making amazing gains in the gym and reaching phenomenal and impressive levels of size and strength have instead been regulated to years of staying at light weights, striving for absolutely perfect form, failing, restarting at lower weights, and repeating the process over and over again.  People have now become so completely paranoid about the slightest hint of back rounding, elbow flaring, shallow depth, etc etc that we seemed to have forgotten that all of this was simply a means to achieve a goal: getting bigger and stronger.  Instead, we have now changed the means INTO the goal, with many trainees foolishly admiring the form a lifter employs in their training, rather than the results this form has achieved.

Let me be frank: seeking the advice of the internet on achieving your goals is seeking the advice of those who have failed on how to succeed.  The internet has FAR more failures inhabiting it than those who have managed success, and the advice you receive in turn will be on how to fail, not succeed.  It is the blind leading the blind, and if you are lucky you may accidentally have someone parrot actual good advice from a legitimate source, but for the most part everything accepted as dogma is simply perversions and mutations of actual good advice.  The loudest voice online is the least successful.

The absence of a counter argument in many cases simply indicates a lack of need

On this topic, those who contribute advice and critique to form checks are simply those regurgitating what they have been told is good advice.  In turn, all they simply do is state the obvious.  “Your back is rounding”, “you have buttwink (which, by the way, hearing someone say “buttwink” is a great way to know that they aren’t strong)”, “your knees are caving in”, etc etc.  These statements are useless.  It would be akin going to the doctor with a cold and him telling you with full authority “Your nose is running, you have a slight cough, and are running a mild fever”.  Thanks Doc, how do we fix it?!

We laugh, but is it any better with a form check?

Herein is where we identify once again the deficiencies of this system.  In theory, the internet form check is a boon that allows us the useful observation of many other trainees with helpful advice.  In reality, the latter is missing, and the observation is far from useful.  These good Samaritans are finely skilled at the art of critique, but when it comes to knowing how to get bigger and stronger, they are lacking.  Nowhere is the contribution “your back is rounding BECAUSE your feet are too far apart”, or “your knees are caving in BECAUSE your feet aren’t angled out”, mainly because these fine denizens of the internet are clueless on how to actually succeed, and instead only know how to tear people down.

It is this talent at destruction that is in turn so pervasive and horrific within the internet community, which creates a culture where success is impossible.  Those that foolishly submit their form to the internet are admonished for any attempt to exert effort, told instead that they MUST reset the weight until they can meet some impossible standard of perfect form (which, coincidentally, is ONLY possible when using a weight that is too light to elicit any manner of physical change).  Ghost stories and legends are told of experiencing “snap city”, “snapping your shit up”, and other such drivel that is once again only ever said by someone who has failed to accomplish anything impressive.  The trainees that post on these videos have not only never experienced success, but in many cases have never even experienced an injury to even know WHAT it feels like when form deviates so bad as to result in one.  They have lived a life of such extreme deluded paranoia that they have no frame of reference for what it means to even train.  And they speak in such masses with such volume that any attempt to preach sanity, effort, toil and hard work is immediately drowned out as dangerous.

Strong people encourage effort, weak people discourage it

When met with examples of highly successful trainees using form that is not what has been deemed as “safe”, all manner of excuses come out.  Genetics, drugs, experience, “advanced techniques”, whatever the case may be. As an intelligent reader, surely you can deduce from this that the ONLY people that are following the “safe form” are the unsuccessful trainees, and the successful people seem to be following the unsafe form.  Knowing this, whose approach seems worth emulating?

Allow me to offer my own universal approach to form critiques.  Odds are, if your form is failing, it’s because your set up is poor.  Many trainees falsely diagnose inability to maintain a strong position with a weakness in the muscles that support said condition, but truth be told, I have never seen someone unable to keep a neutral back due to a weak back.  Instead, they simply never put themselves into a position wherein they could even effectively RECRUIT the muscles necessary to maintain good posture.  If you videotape your lift and notice an issue with execution, you have already identified what the internet would have told you about your form.  Now it is up to you to play around with how you put yourself in the position to execute the movement, watch others with levers similar to yours, and find out where the discrepancies exist.

There is no universal cure for “back rounding”, but I know an easy fix for “feet too far apart”.

GET BIT BY THE GYM ZOMBIE

There is an epidemic that is spreading at commercial gyms: zombism.  Though small in number, reported sightings of the commercial gym zombie continue to increase each day.  The symptoms of commercial gym zombism are as follows.

-Perpetual moan emitted of “GAAAAAINS” as they shamble through the training area.

-Tendency to fixate on one object/activity with total disregard for surroundings.  There have been reports of commercial gym zombies clipping unobservant gym patrons with a barbell while performing the squat and still completing the set with zero issues.  Other such reports include zombies that walked directly to the pair of dumbbells they needed from the rack, in doing so forcing many patrons to create enough space between themselves and the rack in order to allow the zombie through.  This has of course upset many gym goers, who firmly believe it is well within their rights to perform their exercises exactly 3” away from the rack.

'merica!

-Limited vocabulary.  Most zombies, upon encountering a gym patron occupying a piece of equipment that they desire access to, will only mutter “work in?” while pointing at the object of their affection.  This of course is an indication of social deviancy, as the zombie has completely neglected to perform the standardized ritual of waving at the gym goer, asking them how many sets they have left with an aura of simultaneous aloofness paired with desire to use the equipment, and then passive aggressively occupying the space while watching the gym patron exercise until the equipment frees up.  This lack of social grace can only be chalked up to an overactive repitilian brain that operates purely off of the need to feed.

-Noted “thousand yard stare” between sets.  The gym zombie seems unaware of the activity going on around him at the gym, and during his time spent not lifting, he appears to be in some sort of “resting” status.  Were cognition possible, one would think that the zombie was in some sort of deep thought, contemplating his next set, exercise, how his progression has succeeded, or any other training related though that one may engage in to better themselves.  However, given the diminished mental state of the zombie, this seems wholly impossible, and is most likely simply coincidence.

-Disregard for external stimuli.  Given the lack of central nervous system, the gym zombie seems completely unaware of a gym’s lack of air conditioning, or too powerful of a heating system, or too strong of an air conditioning unit, or any other such discomfort other patrons are experiencing.  In many cases, the gym zombie can be witnessed wearing the same training attire, regardless of climate, and seems more concerned with utility than outward appearances.

Note the tank top OVER the t-shirt, completely removing the ability to display one's biceps

-Unawareness of “self”.  The concept of “self” of course is only possible to those in possession of higher level intellect, and due to the effect of zombism on the brain, the gym zombie has completely lost this concept.  This becomes evident by the zombie’s inability to recognize itself in a mirror.  In fact, in  most cases it seems that the gym zombie is completely unaware that there are mirrors in the gym at all, fixating on a spot straight ahead over the horizon whenever they engage in any sort of training, and not at all concerned with checking their form or ensuring that their gym attire accurately reflect s the hard work they are performing.

-Complete disregard for injury and damage.  This once again is a representation of the gym zombie’s diminished nervous system.  There have been many stories of patrons observing a gym zombie train despite encountering “career ending” injuries to include, but not limited to: sprained ankle, stubbed toe, pulled muscles, broken hand, shoulder dislocation, torn ACL, 10lb plate falling on their head, bloody noses, scrapped shins, etc etc.  Additionally, gym zombies perform their lifts with TERRIBLE form, which clearly they are only capable of due to their diseased state.  Were a normal human attempt to try this, they would DEFINITELY get injured, no questions asked, 100% of the time.
-Insatiable hunger.  Gym zombies crave gains, and are never satisfied with what they have achieved.  Most patrons have observed gym zombies training year round, continuously making progress and growing ever larger and more powerful.  This of course poses a significant threat to those gym goers who have been training for years but don’t have the genetics, drugs, time, energy, food, money, coaching, or fortune of being infected by a terrible disease to be able to make such progress.

Bullets will only make him mad

After reading these symptoms, I imagine many of you are aware that you have in fact come into contact with a gym zombie.  Fear not though, for some people are of a certain genetic strain that they are immune to gym zombism.  If you display the following quantities, consider yourself safe from contamination.


-Total awareness of all the stupid people around you at the gym.  If you have nicknames for everyone at your gym, and know that certain people always perform half reps and that some people aren’t on the super awesome program that you’re on that you just KNOW is going to make you huge one day, you do not possess the single mindedness seen in gym zombies.

-Need to correct bad form.  The good Samaritan qualities that you possess contrast entirely with the gym zombies sole need for gains.  The zombie no longer possess the overpowering empathy, good will, and integrity that you as a fine upstanding gym citizen do.  So long as you selflessly come to the aid of all the poor souls who have been tragically misinformed on good form and preach to them the good word of “Starting Strength” and internet form checks, you will be immune to commercial gym zombism.

If you force the guy on the right to pull like the guy on the left, you are immune

-Pride.  Pride is a quality that can only exist in those humans that still possess higher level cognitive abilities, which the gym zombie lacks.  While a gym zombie will make lifts “unpure” by using belts, straps, wraps, sleeves, chalk, cheat reps, half reps, touch and go, machines, etc, those immune to the strain will refuse to lower themselves to this base “animal” state, and will instead ensure to train using ONLY their body and a slippery barbell.

-Ability to retain tomes of information.  The gym zombie’s mind is fixated purely on the pursuit of more gains, it has no room for storage.  If, however, you find that you are able to fully read and commit to memory the words of Mark Rippetoe, Boris Sheiko, Louie Simmons, and many other authors AND can utilize their words to assert, defend, and attack any point in any training argument, you are most definitely immune to gym zombism.  This is especially true if you have no actual experience with these methods, as your ability to take information and predict it’s pattern of success is only possible for those that maintain high level of intellect.

-Complex digestive system.  The gym zombie’s internal systems have degraded to a bare basic level, and as such they seem to be able to progress in the gym off of any sort of fuel they intake.  Low cost food, non-organic food, fast food, cheap supplements (or in some cases NO supplements), no matter the source, the gym zombie progress.  If, however, your digestive system is complex enough that you require a pre-workout supplement, along with accurate and precise pre, peri and post workout nutrition, along with all other meals dialed in to the macro in order to make progress, you can rest assured that you will not be infected by the gym zombie.

The original cure

-Long warm-up.  As was previously indicated, the gym zombie does not have an effective system for noting body temperature and, when paired with an inability to sense pain and ability to perform dangerous form, we find that they spend little, if any, time warming up. As one immune to gym zombism, you will of course require an EXTENSIVE warm up in order to ensure you are properly ready and able to lift weights.  If you are unable to effectively train without at LEAST 5 minutes of steady state cardio, 5-10 minutes of foam rolling, 5-10 minutes of dynamic stretching and 5-10 minutes of mobility work, you are in the clear from gym zombism infection.


I will continue to keep you posted as reports of more sightings occur.  Until then, stay safe.
     

HOME GYM LESSONS LEARNED

As another birthday approaches and another awesome gift from my wife enters my garage (this year, a pair of 105lb dumbbells, last year a strongman log), it dawns on me that I’ve amassed quite an impressive home gym over the years, and in doing so learned quite a few lessons about the differences between home gyms and commercial gyms.  It is my intent here to pass those lessons onto you, the reader, so that, should you decide to go down this path (or if you’ve already done so and are looking for another perspective), you may learn from my experiences.

This picture is actually pretty old.  I've added since then.

BARE BASICS


If all you want is to just get away from the gym and still get stronger, I would argue that all you need is a pair of squat stands, a barbell, some plates, and an iron gym.  This will allow you to perform a variety of squats, overhead pressing, chins, deadlifting, and rows, while taking up a very small footprint in whatever space you are working with.  Ironmind used to have a picture in their product catalog of a guy that set up a gym in his apartment where he put away the stands and bar in a closet when he was not using it and took it out to lift, and it was pretty baller.  If you are creative with your programming, this set up can take care of you for years.  That said, here are a few key points to keep in mind.

-Never pay full prices for iron plates.  There are way too many resources available to get used plates.  Look up craigslist, check out garage sales, go to used sporting goods stores, look for gyms that are closing, do whatever it takes, but never pay full price.  The price of iron is constantly going up, don’t be a victim of this. Be aware that cheap plates won’t be calibrated, and will more likely be heavier than advertised, but all this means is that, when you get to a comp with calibrated plates, it will be easier for you.  Bumper plates are a different story, and if you can find a deal, jump on them, but otherwise, be prepared to spend money.

-A cheap bar is not necessarily a bad bar.  There is a lot to be said about high quality barbells, and they are definitely worth the investment once you get heavy into the home gym, but starting off with a cheapo beater bar for the home gym isn’t a terrible idea.  If you’re just starting out and don’t really know if the commitment to the home gym is going to work, it’s better to test the waters with some cheaper equipment, so that not a whole lot is lost.  Additionally, even if you end up purchasing something higher quality, a cheap bar is great to have when you perform rough lifts with it, like rack pulls, pin presses, zerchers from pins, etc.


WHAT TO BUY NEXT?


What I have found that is unique about home gyms is that, many times, you tend to start off with the exotic and work your way back to the mundane.  Don’t get me wrong, expanding from the most basic set up I outlined earlier, I would say the next 2 obvious choices would be a power rack and an adjustable bench, simply because these two purchases once again open you up to a variety of exercise choices.  However, after this, we run into an interesting bit of training philosophy.

One of the key benefits of a home gym is that it’s YOUR gym.  It means it has everything you need and nothing you don’t.  As such, it becomes tough to convince yourself to buy the things that were already readily available for you (and still presently are) at your nearest commercial gym.  I’ll bet your local gym had all sorts of cable machines, dumbbells as far as the eye could see, a leg press, calf raise, etc.  Did it have a reverse hyper?  Glute ham raise?  Swiss bar?  Safety Squat Bar?  Now we’re starting to identify the deficiencies.  In turn, if you really absolutely had to use a lat pulldown machine, you could always swallow your pride and get a day pass, or even (god forbid) a $10 a month membership at your local Planet Fitness type location to use all of their machines, but if you were really aching to use a reverse hyper, your only chance is if YOU own one.

Everyone has a bench press, but how many people do you know that have one of these?

This is why, in my experience, home gyms tend to end up being a collection of the bizarre and exotic.  You start off thinking you’re going to bring the commercial gym experience home, and instead end up crafting something completely unique and specialized.  EMBRACE this.  I’ve had my home gym for over 7 years now, and just NOW put in a lat pulldown and got some heavy dumbbells, whereas the safety squat bar was one of the first things I purchased after the rack, bar and plates.  That normal  stuff is out there and easy to get access to, but if you’re going to have a gym, have YOUR gym.


TAKE CHANCES


“Buy nice, don’t buy twice” is a pithy saying that is cute because it rhymes, but I have found it lacking when it comes to outfitting the home gym.  I’ve honestly had far more successes buying from the sketchiest, shadiest and crappiest looking fitness equipment providers that I can.  This ultimately boils down to who a product is built for, and for what intention.

Keep in mind that when your local commercial gym buys equipment, it does so with the intention that it’s going to get used.  A LOT.  By a LOT of people.  It’s also probably going to get abused, because for one, sometimes people don’t know the correct way to use equipment, but additionally most humans are selfish creatures who don’t care about someone else’s property.  Therefore, they purchase equipment that can last a long time with minimal maintenance while being put through the wringer on a daily basis, year after year.  You won’t be doing this.  Odds are, you will be the only one using the equipment, unless you train with a small group, in which case the amount of use it will experience is still minimal compared to in a commercial gym.  Your stuff doesn’t need to be “built to last”, only built to outlast YOU.

Additionally, it’s very easy to buy into the advertisement hype on some sites, were world record holders talk about how much they love X brand equipment because it can hold up with all the abuse they heap on it, and how they used a cheaper version and it broke in a matter of days. This is where honest self reflection can save you some cash.  I realized that I was not a “big guy” in the world of lifting.  I’m barely 200lbs on a full stomach.  My body simply doesn’t stress a GHR the same way that Brian Shaw’s does.  The big guys definitely need industrial strength stuff, but you may be able to get by with the home version.

I always look for the absolute cheapest deal possible when it comes to my next purchase, and I have only been burned one time by a guy that was selling products he simply didn’t have in his inventory.  Everytime I have RECEIVED a product, it’s accomplished the goal.  It’s a total no frills operation, but since it’s MY gym, I only need to impress myself.  So far, I have gotten away with a cheap safety squat bar, swiss bar, glute ham raise, strongman log, power tower, power rack, landmine, and I’m sure a bunch of other things as well.  When you buy cheap, you have to put it all together yourself, and it comes in a million pieces, but the money you save is money you can invest in another piece of equipment.

I have bought SO much equipment from this site.  I think they saved money by never updating their homepage.

BE CREATIVE


Want to know the difference between deadlift mats and rubber patio tiles?  The former costs $50 per mat more than the latter.  So many items marketed as fitness equipment are being practically given away at other locations when used for a different function.  So much of this is just marketing.  Start getting creative when it comes to outfitting your home gym.

Unless you are pressing 500lbs, you probably don’t need to spend $300 on an axle.  Go to Home Depot, get a 2” steel pipe cut to 7.5’ and use duct tape or hose clamps to make some collars on the end.  Don’t spend $80 on “rack savers”, go buy some towing straps for $5.  They can tow a 2 ton vehicle, they can hold your squat.  Don’t buy “lifting chains” and get killed on shipping and handling, go to a tractor supply store and buy as much chain as you want for pennies.  If you do it right, odds are you will spend more time at Home Depot than Sports Authority.

Additionally, try to be creative with the stuff you DO have.  Many times, a new piece of equipment isn’t necessary, you simply have to make use of all the equipment you DO have.  You’ve got a pull up bar, bands, chains, and a dip belt.  Do you really need a lat pulldown for some variety?  Try band assisted pull ups, or band assisted pull-ups while wearing weight, or thread the chains through your belt so the weight increases as you go up, or put the band through the belt and anchor it to the floor, or etc etc.  Sometimes, something like 2 $5 minibands will open up a million new options, and little toys and tricks can go a long way in providing longevity to your current situation.

THINGS I AM GETTING TIRED OF

I am a patient man, but I still manage to grow weary of the same trends when bombarded with them often enough.  Below is a listing of things that I have had just about enough of in my life.



-Strength gurus who are weak

-Hypertrophy gurus who are small

-Apologists for the above two that constantly point out that just because someone is small and weak doesn’t mean they don’t know how to get big and strong.  I have only ever seen other small and weak people make this claim, and usually it’s because they’re defending their own right to give out training advice when they have no idea what they’re talking about.  Knowledge is dandy, experience is king.

-High school/college kids who “don’t have time” to eat, cook, workout or read.  I genuinely find that these same people manage to sleep past 0500 everyday and have lots of free time on weekends/evenings to party, watch TV, text their friends, post stupid memes on facebook, and in general waste very precious time.  You have lots of time to get crap done if you only sleep 5-6 hours a night.

Comically enough, most of these guys are still sporting more muscular development than many of the people making these claims

-People who call themselves “powerlifters” or say that they are “powerlifting” and have never actually competed in powerlifting.

-The same people who use the false analogy that, since you would call a guy that plays pick up basketball games a “basketball player”, it’s reasonable to call a guy who trains to be stronger in the big 3 a “powerlifter”.  This is a stupid argument, because at least the guy playing pick up games is competing with other players, thus meeting the intent of playing the game.  A guy just training in the gym not actually competing, even in a friendly way, is simply training.  If a guy went to the court 3 hours a day and only shot free throws, he wouldn’t be called a basketball player, he would just be a guy who shoots free throws.  I trained boxing for years, never had a fight, and in turn never called myself a boxer.

-The members of the “IIFYM” crowd that seems completely unaware of things like micronutrients, vitamins, minerals, fiber and other potential nutritional considerations.

-People that go weeks without eating a vegetable.

-People that think corn, beans and potatoes count as vegatables.

Pro Tip: If you enjoy eating them, they probably aren't vegetables

-People who think that just because they don’t like something is license to not do it.

-That annoying feeling my shoulder has been making for the past few weeks like it’s going to fall off.  It should know by now that pain is just going to piss me off, it won’t make me stop abusing it.  It either needs to break or get with the ****ing program.

-People that just plain don’t get it.

-Kids who can’t deadlift 400lbs advising each other on the best pre-workout supplements to take.

-Those same kids wondering why they always feel like they’re going to crap themselves while they’re lifting.

-People that feel the need to psyche themselves up in a commercial gym.  It’s a training session, not a competition, you’re just making yourself weaker, and meanwhile, everyone around you thinks you’re an asshole.  It’s not hardcore.

If you need this to hit a gym lift, something has gone wrong

-That our culture has grown so passive aggressive and socially retarded that every day there is a new thread on reddit asking about gym etiquette and how to work in with someone while they are lifting.  I see it in reality as well.  Whenever I end up in a commercial gym, if I ask to work in with someone, one of two things tends to happen.  They either panic and just flee from the equipment entirely, or they look at me confused and give me an update on how many sets they have left.  Every once in a while though, someone gets it.

-Internet lifting “culture”.  Holy shit, if I see another stupid training meme or someone writing “skwats” I may blow out another blood vessel in my eye.  In general, “irony” is employed by the unsuccessful as an attempt to mask their failures with humor.  I remember back when people talked like adults, now you’re lucky to see a discussion on training with the third response isn’t something like “Brodin skwats OVER 9000 epic bacon zombie Nazis SNAP CITY”.

-How we, as a society, have decided to prize ignorance over intelligence.  In turn, those who put effort into become successful are labeled “try hards”.

-Stronglifts 5x5.  Has anyone actually accomplished anything on this program?

-People critiquing the form of people deadlifting 900lbs.

-The same people that ask rhetorically “do the rules no longer apply just because you can lift a lot of weight?”  The answer is yes.  The path to success defines the rules to achieve it, not the other way around.  If someone else ISN’T doing what you are doing and they are succeeding, it means YOU are wrong, not them.

-Arguments on the internet.  There will never be any resolution, no side will ever agree with the other, and it always boils down to 2 people picking apart single sentences and constructing dumb ad hominem responses.  Generally, as soon as someone lets me know they disagree with me online, I let them.  I know that I know I’m right, and they know that they know they’re right.

-Skinny kids who don’t realize that just because an argument is illogical doesn’t mean it’s incorrect.

-Internet squat depth judges.

-Whiz kids on the internet that get bent out of shape because someone doesn’t know what some obscure exercise is.  Clint Darden once said on youtube that he had no idea what a Romanian deadlift was, and then went on to deadlift 821lbs.  It really doesn’t matter if some guy you’re talking to has never heard of a Spoto Press or Kroc rows or the Bent Press, and truth be told, if they achieved success and NEVER heard of these exercises, maybe it goes to show how valuable they aren’t?  Quit flexing your big brain for a second.

-People that think wishing is a successful method of obtaining results.  Quit wishing your gym had a reverse hyper and just go out and get one.

-People that say they would do ANYTHING to train at the elitefts compound/Westside Barbell/Boss Barbell, etc and then don’t actually quit their job, move across country, live in their cars and panhandle.  Let’s not redefine what “anything” means here folks.

-Those who only have academic proof of the success of their methods.

-The whole notion of “good for you” and “bad for you”.  Nothing is any one of these things, as “for you” has yet to be defined.  If the presumption is always longevity at the expense of everything else, then sure, squatting is not good for you, and may even be bad for you.  However, if any of your goals involve being bigger, stronger, better, faster, more able, etc, then you may end up having to do some things that are “bad for you”, because they are now “good for you”.

We miss you George

-How everytime I try out a slingshot/metal catapult, it totally sucks.  I’m still sticking with reverse bands.

-That my 8 foot long arms, though awesome for deadlfiting, have made it so that I have enough time to think about all of my other poor life decisions when I am locking out a bench press.

-The amount of vitriol people employ to defend their means of training.  You don’t like high bar squats?  Don’t do it.  Don’t like low bar?  Don’t do it.  You’re no one’s savior, you don’t have to convince anyone else about the one true path.