Now we arrived at the “meat and potatoes” of the whole ordeal, and given what we’re read so far we already understand what a non-apt metaphor “meat and potatoes” is, so how about we transition to “steak and eggs”? But either way: party construction, which is to say: diet construction. How are we going to BUILD our adventuring party so that we ensure success during our exploration of various dungeons and exciting locales rather than getting one-shotted by the first goblin raiding party we run up against?
I already can hear the true nerds on the audience yelling "those are orcs!"
Herein it
becomes necessary to do an HONEST stock assessment of your own capabilities
along with the demands of the adventure you are about to embark upon.
Some players
are EXPERT players of arcane spellcasters: they know all the ins and outs of
the rules, where the loopholes are, where they can exploit/leverage things, how
to min/max or “munchkin” the game, and, ultimately, cheat at a game that is
supposed to be “imagination but with rules”.
I have known many a player like this, and they’re an asset to have in
your party so long as you’re at peace with the fact that they’re going to be
the “main character” of your game while you are effectively an NPC. But, if your goal is to have fun rather than
“win Dungeons and Dragons”, these dudes can be a little odious.
This is how it tends to go for me when I try my hand at it
As is
blatantly apparent at this point: I am NOT that player. I just never “got” arcane magic, the biggest
reason being that I don’t want to have to invest post-graduate level effort
into reading and studying the nuances of something I’m doing for the sake of
having fun. Pair this with the fact that
DnD allows me to live out my boyhood power fantasies of being a big and strong
barbarian, and it’s really hard for me to be anything BUT that. In turn, I am VERY good at being that.
It’s no
different with the world of nutrition.
Some folks are nutritional wizards (pun full intended), and their
mastery of carbohydrates is awe inspiring.
Justin Harris is a fantastic example of this, and hearing him discuss
carb cycling for bodybuilding is dizzying in the amount of detail and nuance he
is able to discuss and dissect how carbs impact physique. Stan Efferding is another fantastic example,
as is Skip Hill and his “skiploading” protocol.
These folks have read all the rules, the sub-rules, the current errata,
the spinoffs, etc, and can take that education and work magic where us scrubs
just stumble. Unless YOU are that guy,
your best bet is to recruit these dudes, let them run the party, and relegate
yourself to being an NPC.
When your coach is as big and strong as a half-orc and smart as a wizard, you best listen
Absent that
resource, you may have to be at peace with the fact that your adventuring party
is going to be pretty bare bones: warriors and divine magic users. COULD you have an arcane spellcaster in the
party? Of course, but keep in mind: all
decisions are opportunity costs. That
arcane spellcaster COULD have been another strong sword arm, or another healer. When you elect to have the arcane
spellcaster, you choose to NOT have any of the other two classes. Which, ultimately, is going to benefit you
more?
And to
answer that question, we then must ask “what kind of quest are we about to
embark on?” Is this a one-shot campaign
where we just fight off a goblin horde over the course of an afternoon, or are
we engaging in a multi-year long expedition wherein we expect to go from level
1 to 20, fully flesh out our characters and fight off the most epic level
challenges available? Because the party
that can do well in the case of the former will most likely be unequipped for
the challenges of the latter…but, in turn, the amount of effort necessary to
craft a party for the case of the latter would most likely take up the WHOLE
play session for the former, meaning we never even get to play the game because
we were too worried about the details!
We could all stand to have a little more of this in our lives
We see that
with trainees all the time: they want an “optimized” diet for a non-optimal
goal. They want to eat like an IFBB pro
even though all they’re trying to do is put on some quality muscle, lean out
and get healthier. The IFBB pro eats the
way they eat because there is a PRIZE at the end: their “why” can overcome
their “how”. But if your goals are nebulous
and your timeframe indefinite, you will absolutely burnout trying to employ an
eating strategy that is intended to deliver extreme results on a specific date
and time and then immediately cease.
Much like trying to build a level 20 adventuring party for a simple
afternoon game, trying to force this much specificity, effort and compliance
toward a goal that does not necessitate it is just going to ensure that no fun
is actually had.
Now, if one
DOES have such lofty ambitions, they should absolutely learn the ins and outs
of arcane magic, or bring on board someone that does so that they can benefit
from all of their knowledge and experience.
I may be a simple barbarian, but I must recognize and acknowledge the
power contained in arcane magic. I have
witnessed first hand those that are expert carbohydrate manipulators and the
results they can achieve with them, and they cannot be ignored nor
handwaved. Carbs ARE magic: kudos to the
magicians that have mastered them.
I remember when we were TRYING to pretend that these were healthy
But my
adventure is not THEIR adventure. I am
here to have fun. And in that regard, my
adventuring party is a simple one: warriors and divine spellcasters, with the
occasional mercenary arcane spellcaster showing up if we ever wanna spice up
the session, or simply “remember” what arcane magic is like. And often, that arcane spellcaster showing up
serves specifically as a reminder of why we don’t regularly have one in the
party: they’re more trouble than they are worth, and we have less fun when
they’re around.
So again,
take an assessment here. WHAT kind of
adventure are you about to embark on, and what are your honest to goodness
capabilities here? If you’re like me,
want to have fun and have a grasp of the basics, a simple adventuring party
covering the basic needs will be more than adequate, and anything beyond that
may simply overwhelm you and take away the fun of the game. If you’re going on a grand journey, are you
EQUIPPED with the knowledge necessary to do so?
If not, will you study the rules in order to improve that, or will you
recruit someone who knows how to min/max?
If not, there’s a fair chance you won’t have any fun either, primarily
because, despite your intentions of killing the dragon, saving the kingdom and
raiding the treasury, you end up getting killed by an opportunistic kobold.
Folks,
that’s a total of 16 pages and over 7500 words, and I could honestly go on and
on with this analogy. I’m going to table
this for now, but I hope you had as much fun reading it as I did writing it.
Leeeeeeeerrrrrreooyyy Jenkins!
ReplyDeleteSo enjoyable to read and the metaphors you make work so well! What a great series :)
ReplyDeleteHey thanks so much! It's funny: these posts get the least readership (with precipitous declines per entry) but seem to be the favored ones among my regulars.
DeleteExcellent series. This made me reread your old min/max writing as well as NPC post, two of my favorite training related articles ever. As a non-DND reader, I seem to really enjoy the DND posts. Thank you!!!
ReplyDeleteI really appreciate that feedback dude! It's good to know it can resonate among those not versed in the nerdlore. You've got me considering complying all the DnD stuff into one spot sometime.
DeleteI love all this, and it's so fun for me to think about carbs in your D&D metaphor, especially as I'm getting back into distance running
ReplyDeleteIf traditional D&D/sword and sorcery campaigns are muscle building/physical transformation, is the pursuit of increased endurance an entirely different tabletop game?
Bringing it back to D&D, I love how since carbs result in more full looking muscles, it's the party wizard casting some sort of illusion over the party to make it look more dangerous than it actually is
Holy cow, I love the direction you just took that! We can even talk about how the bump up in glucose/glycogen is only a temporary spell effect that wears off over time, whereas your baseline present when carb depleted is what your "real stats" reflect.
DeleteAnd different rules for different games: that's so clutch! Like d20 vs World of Darkness.